The Theory of Funkativity

I recently lost my wallet, and consequently had to make the trek to the DMV to get my driver's license replaced. 

I hate the DMV. 

The lines are always hundreds of people long....the people that work there tend to be very upset about their job....and there's always some form you were supposed to have filled
 out, but no one told you that you needed it...

This time around, I had a much more pleasant experience. I made an appointment, bypassing the multi-hour line, and had the great fortune of being helped by a very nice employee named Ed.

Ed, it turns out, was a very enlightened man. He had these bits of wisdom to share:

1. Plan and pay for my funeral now...before prices go up.
2. Fill a large jug 1/3 of the way up with water, tilt it at an angle in your freezer, take it out the next morning, pour water into it, and have ice cold drinking water alllllll day long.
3. Request that my donated organs (in case of my having a car accident) don't go to hard drug users.
4. Check out the $1 book store next to the AMC theatre near us. Also, be sure to see movies in the ETX screening threatre at the AMC....
5. Petition to have the voter registration form taken out of the generic DMV forms. 99% of people just throw away that form, costing the city over $800,000 a year in printing....and the unused paper isn't recycled.

Thanks Ed...I appreciate it.